so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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