oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
