My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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