You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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