Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Randomize
