i jhust puked up my retainher.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Randomize
