is your mom at the bar?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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