I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
