Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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