I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
