You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
