I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
