I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
