you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
