dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize