I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
