what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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