garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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