is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
