This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
