he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
