He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize