Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
