Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
