I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I didn't notice because vodka
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize