i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
