just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize