And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize