Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
im having a threesome with these popsicles
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
ttyl tear gas
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
