If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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