Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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