you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Randomize
