you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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