Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
