I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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