The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
