I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
