Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize