what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
