can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize