Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
