I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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