I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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