You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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