ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
