please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
