Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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