Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
