I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
