Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
