If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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