No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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