what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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